The Happiness Project Part II

Part two of The Happiness Project asks that I write on all or some of the below questions, so here goes....

Why am I doing this project, What is my history of trying to be more happy, and What does happiness look like to me?

Why am I doing this project? Well, I could use a boost in the happiness part of my life. I'm homesick, whether it be the real 'home' (Fla where my parents, schools that I went to growing up, childhood friends are etc) or the home that became home (Tx, where our church home is, our friends who are more like family are, our kids school is, EVERYTHING I feel is there but there's one thing missing, us) I'm not seeing the joy in staying home with our kids anymore, so in general I guess I'm just not at a very happy point in my life. I'm hoping and praying this changes.

My history of trying to be happy? Well, let's see. Fla, growing up there, in a small (ish) town where it seemed like everyone knew everyone I felt like I couldn't wait to get out of there and see the world! The grass isn't always greener on the other side...we moved to Tx and it wasn't 'home' It was a hard 18 months living away from home. Countless arguments with the husband, lonliness set in, and then I decided I had to put myself out there to meet people, they weren't going to knock on our door asking to be my friend. So, I got involved with church, bible study, play group for our son...and that is where I started meeting the ladies that touched my life, and my happiness started coming around. We were in Tx for 5 1/2 years, remember 18 months of those I was pretty unhappy, so I had my happiness for a good 3 years. Now I'm back at square one, or so it feels like. I'm now trying to get involved....I've got the kids involved with scouts, in church, in bible studies, but I'm lacking the friends I had in Tx. I've met a couple of ladies who are 'friends' but I'd label only one of them as 'close friend' Definetly a different feeling, going from 12 or so close friends where we see eachother almost daily, got together weekly, went to church together, kids playing together. 12 to 1, that stings, alot.

What does happiness look like to me? Good question! In a perfect world I'd love to pick up and go back home...whether it be Fla or Tx, but it's just not going to happen like that. Happiness to me looks/feels like the weight of the world isn't on my shoulders. It wouldn't be hard to wake up and pull myself out of bed every am. I'd find joys in everything, my kids, my new city, my husband, etc

That elusive happiness, I'm desperately searching for it.....